In this powerful and deeply validating conversation, Lindsie sits down with energetics coach Jessie Morassut to explore the hidden patterns that keep women stuck in burnout, over-giving, and disconnection from themselves. Drawing from her own experience as a former teacher, Jessie shares how caregiving roles—whether in careers, relationships, or everyday life—can quietly condition women to put themselves last. Together, they unpack the unconscious programming behind selflessness, the warning signs of resentment and over-performance, and why so many women don’t recognize their own needs until their bodies force them to. This episode offers a compassionate and practical starting point for change. From cultivating curiosity without judgment to identifying your needs, setting boundaries, and reconnecting with your energy, Lindsie and Jessie guide listeners toward a more sustainable, supportive way of living. If you’ve been stuck in survival mode, feeling drained, or disconnected from your vitality—this conversation is your invitation to pause, listen, and begin again.
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(0:00 - 41:36) To name like you're allowed to feel that way Right, like you're not put on this planet to be a stressed out like hyper vibrating Human being like you are meant to be here and to blossom to feel joy to radiate You know and really do what feels best for you Welcome back to PCOS unfiltered where we go beyond the diagnosis and start paying attention to the messages our bodies Habits and experiences have been trying to send us all along Today's conversation is such an important one especially for the women who are constantly giving caring showing up and Carrying so much for everyone else that they've lost touch with themselves in the process My guest today is Jessie Morassut.
Jessie is an energetics coach who supports individuals in restoring empowering and managing their energy so they can feel their best She works primarily with women in caregiving public service or leadership roles to help them put the oxygen mask on themselves first Her approach is deeply nurturing gentle and client led Jessie also brings a powerful personal perspective to this work with a background as an elementary school teacher She learned firsthand how damaging environments that promote over giving Selflessness and constant performance can be now she helps women recognize those patterns Reconnect with their own needs and create a more supportive sustainable way of living in this episode We talked about burnout and caregiving roles the conditioning that teaches women to put themselves last How resentment and over performance can become warning signs and what it actually looks like to begin prioritizing yourself without guilt We also talked about boundaries Self-compassion supportive environments and those small but powerful first steps that can help you reconnect with your vitality This is the conversation that I know so many women need to hear especially if you've been stuck in survival mode for far too long Now as a reminder the content shared on PCOS unfiltered is for informational and educational purposes only The views and opinions expressed by the hosts and guests are not intended to serve as medical advice Always consult with a qualified health care professional before making any changes to your diet exercise or treatment plan The information shared is based on personal experience and expert interviews and it's not a substitute for professional medical guidance So let's get into it. Here is my conversation with Jessie Morrissey Welcome welcome and welcome to Jessie. I am super super excited for this I Feel like I don't know I'm still talking to a lot of nurses and teachers that like Have gone through changes and you know, I've seen both sides now, so I'm super excited for this conversation So starting off can you share your your journey from teacher to coach and what ultimately called you to make that shift? Yeah, absolutely. Thank you for having me Lindsie. I'm so happy to be having this conversation today So such a big shift in a lot of ways not a big shift as well I really loved what I did teaching so bit of backstory I was a grade 1 to French immersion teacher here in Canada, and I absolutely Loved teaching. I loved working with kids That part of it was not the issue at all and over some time I really started to notice that This really wasn't feeling sustainable, you know to continue doing over the course of many years And a lot of other teachers kind of coming up with me at that time we were noticing similar things right like wait a second this doesn't feel like maybe how it used to be and This isn't feeling like something we can per se continue. And so for me, I really moved through a sequence of noticing my personal wellness really degrading significantly and This was you know, a lot of different things that once this was feeling really Confused, you know a job that I really loved but was feeling not well to continue doing by effect and so that was very confusing a lot of feeling, you know, kind of embarrassed and ashamed that Again a job. I loved I just wasn't doing well in it. And when I say well like personal wellness, so yeah, a lot of that was you know is kind of in the tunnel with things so to speak and you know just to name some of the the masks that we wear when we really need to keep going and You know some of the perfectionism the pushing through You know the selflessness that we hear in these kind of caregiving roles really has a cost and so I really was met with that and really felt that very fully and So taking some time away stepping away from that because I really had to You know what? I eventually started shifting into was supporting those Where I was, you know about six years ago, so the support that I needed When I was stuck in burnout cycles when I was feeling resentment this is really that preventative wellness that I get to support others with today and so You know something that I'm so deeply passionate about. Of course, I've lived it. And so I know this experience really well and you know just to name that This is so much bigger than us, right? We are in these professions in these roles doing the best we can and often we don't know what we don't know And so just to name that as well, you know such a journey that it's been for me But so deeply meaningful to now be kind of giving back to you again what I really needed You know about six years ago or so. Yeah. Yeah I mean, that's I think that's why we we just hit it off the first time we talked because our stories aligned granted it was nursing for me, you know, but like I said, I've also like as I as I Find more guests on the podcast and just meet more people You know doing this and collaborating and networking I am finding so many nurses and teachers that are going through, you know similar things. And yeah, I neglected my health for so so many And then ignored all the signs, of course when it was, you know Trying to tell me my body was trying to tell me something.
And so Yeah, so it's super important that you were doing as well So drawing from your experience as a woman and educator and now a coach What do you see as the biggest challenge within caregiving roles or professions? Mmm, yeah, I mean, it's a good question I think there's a couple of things here that come to mind But the first thing just to mention is that women generally speaking are really conditioned to be caregivers and so even if you don't identify as You know a caregiver in the sense of being a mother or you're maybe not in a caregiving Profession like teaching or nursing just to you know, name a couple examples You're likely still in some way shape or form in conditioning of caregiving and what I mean by that is this, you know piece of putting others first and Taking care of others as the primary and so this can come out in so many different kind of nuanced ways But this is something that I see with clients all the time is kind of these sneaky forms of the ways that we put ourselves last And that being really something that is, you know, kind of normalized to us and so what happens when we receive this messaging often unconscious and I want to name that as well that you didn't necessarily put up your hand and say Yeah, I'd love to be programmed in with the conditioning to be putting myself last, you know Of course not right like this is an unconscious programming. And so When it is unconscious, it means that we're kind of doing it by default unless we change that default and so Suddenly our you know, our needs our availability like am I even Resourced enough. Do I have the energy to do something that's been asked of me, you know That doesn't really come into the equation and certainly not first And so just to name, you know again the caveat that this is not your fault If you're resonating with that and saying like ooh, that sounds about right You're really a byproduct of the culture environment around you. And so To me, that's kind of one of the biggest challenges is this unconscious piece and kind of how we're operating out In this default kind of patterned way Yeah now on the flip side The biggest opportunity Those caregiving roles, yeah Yeah, absolutely and I think So important to name that as well because there's a huge opportunity that goes hand-in-hand with this and that is then to notice right like bring that awareness to this fact and From there.
That's how you start to change how you show up, you know your relationships to Expectations and cultural norms and it's really starting to embody what really feels the most supportive and true to you and Just to name as well that the ripple effect right of one person placing boundaries and standing for their needs and forcing their needs And choosing not to shape shift, you know into this performance mode Really does have an effect on the whole ecosystem around you. Yeah. Yeah Yeah, take notice Yeah, I mean it is something that that I I talk about with my clients, you know my book actually like It's just first step start paying attention to these things take a couple notes, you know throughout the day Yeah, super important super important So if someone is listening and recognizing this dynamic in their own life, which I feel like There's probably got to be at least one of one of them out there Where can they begin to explore it and then maybe gently start to shift it? Yeah, absolutely And so the first thing again is kind of similar to this last piece we spoke about around noticing is Curiosity and so I love to start with curiosity and this is you know when I think back to teaching second graders, right like that curiosity comes in spades and so as Adults, we sometimes forget to be curious and Forget to be curious about ourselves and how we're operating and is that even helpful in serving us? So the first piece here is really to get curious about the ways that you may be putting yourself second and Then from there we start to name how this might be showing up and the result That it has on us when we put ourselves second And so an example of this might be you know, I'm noticing that I'm feeling a lot of resentment in my day Or that I'm exhibiting maybe some passive aggressiveness that isn't really me like that's not how I want to be Operating that's not true Maybe I'm really operating on overdrive and hyper performance mode So all these different ways that you know, these kind of coping mechanisms really that can come into play when we are You know showing up in this way that is really for other first And then the third yeah. Yeah. Sorry. Go ahead. No, go ahead. Go ahead Yeah, I was gonna just share the third one, which is we start to consider how we want to feel instead And so, you know if we are noticing like wow I'm feeling so resentful at work all day long or at home with my kiddo or whatever it is And I don't want to feel that way It's like how do we want to feel? You know a lot of what I get with clients is calm. Like I want to feel calm in the day Or I want to feel peaceful. I want to feel empowered and So just to name like you're allowed to feel that way Right, like you're not put on this planet to be a stressed out like Hyper-vibrating Human being like you are meant to be here and to blossom to feel joy to radiate You know and really do what feels best for you So we're really not here just to operate for other and I think that's something important to name Yeah, yeah super important it made me think of The Walt Whitman quote, which was also I need to blast off fans out there But you know the be curious not judgmental because I think that goes along with it, right? You know you have to yes be curious but but no shame no judgment, you know Just start understanding like you said and then think about how you you don't want to feel on the other side of that. Yeah Yeah, absolutely. That's a great You know piece there and I think something so important what you said is the not shaming or judging Myself and that can be really hard Like that's easier said than done and I think that's where some of this curiosity is so important Because when we're you know, I'm really coming into you we can think about like the fundamentals of meditation, you know Curiosity is one of them Beginners mindset is another one right where we're kind of meeting ourselves like to square one again each moment and really getting getting curious and bringing in the kindness and saying like Okay, like what is going on? is this how I want this to be and That permission that you get to give yourself by shifting that kind of mindset there. Yeah. Yeah
There's that phrase putting the oxygen mask on yourself first, right? I feel like most people have probably heard that at some point whether that's on an airplane or just in general But what does that actually look like in real life, especially for women who are used to giving? Mm-hmm Yeah, such a good question I'm actually gonna bring us just back for a moment here because a really important step that I forgot to mention Just at the tail end of your last question. There was starting to embody the qualities that we want to feel and This is an important one that I'm going to mention first before I get into this piece around putting the oxygen mask on first because You know a big piece of what I do with clients is okay. They name. I want to feel calm Excellent first step and from there we want to kind of look at well what is the calm person do like what does that mean to you and The difference here being you know, not what does what do you think a calm person does? But what does it feel like for you when you are calm? what might actually make you feel calm and So starting to kind of bring some of these answers to life, you know, is it Just having 20 minutes in the morning for me like not needing to do anything not needing to be anywhere Like maybe I'm just lying in bed staring at the ceiling for 20 minutes. Maybe I'm doing a meditation Maybe I'm taking a longer shower like whatever it is. That would feel super Giving to you in terms of bringing about that calm quality That embodiment of it is such an important step in this, you know Okay, that's that's something I want to feel. How can I do that and and starting to play with this? You know, how are the how can I start to bring this into my days or into my week? And maybe you try something and you don't really like that or it doesn't really work for you Or it doesn't make you feel calm. It makes you feel more agitated and just again that curiosity and going Okay, you know interesting that didn't quite work Let's try something else. Let's see What else might support me here? And this is I'm sure you see this as well with your clients. This is where Journeying together is the beneficial part. You know, this isn't an overnight Okay, I'm gonna meditate tomorrow and boom. We're good to go I wish you know, yeah, not at all It's so often like okay, let's try this and then come and meet together and let's chat about it and you know okay, this is perhaps something new we can try and and having that discussion and being able to move with someone else in that process is You know what? I see with clients to be really the important part of this is being kind of Held as you as you try and test in this process. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, it's not It's not linear. There's ups and downs Question there.
Yeah oxygen mask to put that on yourself. I mean, this is one of my favorite phrases Because I think we've all if we've flown in an airplane You've definitely heard it like over and over right put the oxygen mask on yourself first before helping another like and I think Oftentimes it's so I mean, it's so applicable in our everyday life, especially as women again What does this look like for me? What does it actually mean? You know off the airplane like in real life How can I give to myself first and what does that do for me? And so there was a couple years back now the whole concept of filling your cup at least in teaching This was quite popular to do with your students, right? so you can imagine having to like red solo cups and you fill them with dirt and You would have one with holes in the bottom, right? And then you'd have the other one just you know Like you're continuing to add more soil into it And so it's overflowing and as you can imagine the one with holes is just draining that soil out all the time and so this concept of are we giving from empty or depletion or Are we giving in the world and just giving by being ourselves like existing? We don't need to be giving in a caregiving sense per se are we giving from overflow, you know And how does that feel different like in our bodies and our beings like on this wellness side of things? and so How do we start to put that oxygen mask on ourselves first like truly? We bring the curiosity and the kindness into the moments of our days and we ask ourselves the question This is one of my favorites to kind of reflect for yourself. What do I need right now? Like in this moment, what do I really need and you know the next step with that is the follow-through and Like starting super small with this. I need a 30-second break. Like I just need a quick pause Reset and Come back into what it is that I'm doing maybe I need to open the window and just like feel the fresh air for a minute and Look outside and notice the bird flying by reset You know so it can be super super small Maybe I need to drink some water like when's the last time I had a sip of water all day and so You know asking ourselves that question. What do we need and following through on that? like small but absolutely huge in terms of what that can provide to you and shift in your days And then just to name as well like getting to know your needs Am I someone who needs to work out in the morning before I do anything else? Do I need to meditate, you know for 20 minutes? Really considering and you can make this a list like write it out As I need statements, I need a work environment where I feel supported. I need non-aggressive communication in a relationship and a lot of us and clients I've worked with I've done a whole workshop on this before and Most people come to me saying I have not once before Sat down to take an inventory of my needs Like I don't know actually You know, so to take that moment that's a super powerful practice as well and Really ties into the next piece of boundaries and So this is boundaries with yourself a lot of the time, you know I will not take on new tasks at work beyond my current workload. I Will register to that yoga class that super supports me four times a week and the self-compassion which I touched on already, but you know really this piece of offering offering yourself the kindness and That you would a dear friend or someone you really care about And you know self-compassion has kind of infinite returns on it and Again can be really challenging to get started with I know for me you know, I was introduced to self-compassion when I was still teaching and It completely broke me and healed me all at once You know like Of myself that I was in so many different ways and to start to soften that and really offer this kind of soothing and gentleness to yourself was really a game changer for me and Again can be super small like it can be swaying It can be you know taking a bath or offering like really nourishing self-touch like Scratching up your arm. I just offering some gentleness to ourselves Again has really profound profound impacts Yeah. Yeah, I know for me.
I think even once I left nursing I Still I was still go go go to open the gym and even then it was still like, you know I had big goals and I was I actually had my own employees You know to take care of and obviously the business and like and it wasn't until My own health scares, you know that I had to say, okay. It is time for for me. I gotta take care of myself You know but unfortunately And Unfortunately, that's when it happens for a lot of women I think is when they do have like some type of big wake-up call or scare of some sort You know, so just I hope anybody listening is really really listening and I can take that first step You know to make some changes now before it gets to that point. Yeah Yeah, absolutely and just to name to you like what you're saying is is so relatable and I think the work we're both doing is Because we had experiences of that right of kind of the crumbling or the health deterioration and Just again to echo what you're saying to anyone listening like that does not need to be your path Exactly. That does not have to be your path and We are here and other people are doing work in these kinds of spaces, you know to shift and change How we are operating in the world and how we're showing up for ourselves So that it doesn't get to that point. Yeah. Yeah So, how might someone navigate if they notice maybe there's a larger problem at play where maybe it's an environment setting Or a relationship that isn't aligned with us being able to put ourselves first and living You know a well-lived life Mm-hmm yeah, and this I think is such a good follow-up to what we're just talking about because There's only so much you can kind of do yourself sometimes and There are moments where you need to consider this larger picture, right? Look at kind of a setting you're in or environment and see the ways in which that this might be impacting you and most often is right and so just to name that this can be really nuanced and You know I do believe there are a lot of larger systems and structures that I really hope we're in the midst of changing and shifting right now Ones that don't always set us up for success. I think that's really important to name here You know, I'm not about to like gaslight anyone into like this is a you problem No, right like this is often like we're speaking again about these kind of Unconscious conditioning pieces of how we're told to act right these come from structures and systems already set up and in place and so Where you come in is you and your power right like you have agency choice and sovereignty and That is always present within you and so at any moment in time You can take an inventory right of the settings the spaces relationships people in your life What feels good? like what supports your wellness and This can be a little confronting sometimes, right? Like I know when I've done this in the past and I've done this for some relationships even and I've gone.
Oh So interesting, you know, some of these friendships aren't actually supporting my wellness and So just to kind of give that permission that again you get to put yourself first You get to really do this inventory and consider Like do I need to put in some new boundaries in different scenarios in my life? Do I need to change how I relate to them take space from certain? situations and Really not being afraid to again Create that distance if you need from certain things in your life to get a new perspective to get some fresh kind of eyes to look at things can be really helpful and beneficial and again, this isn't to name that everyone's story is Leaving let's say a caregiving profession like was the case for both of us again We're doing this work to support people so that they can be their best selves in what they're meant to be doing in the world But really just to name like again, do I need more boundaries? Do I need to remove myself from an extracurricular? do I need to remove myself from a Relationship and so doing that inventory and being reminded of your sovereignty and your agency That to me is you know, we could be reminded of that. I think every day. It's an important one for sure Oh, yeah, for sure. Yeah, I mean and understandably it's it May not be easy, you know, especially if you're talking about, you know a relationship or You know something like that. It's definitely not Not going to be easy, but you definitely you know, I've been through I've been through some of that too You know and yeah, it was tough, but definitely coming out on the other side so much better, you know, so Just know that the support is out there, you know to help you along the way too. Yeah Absolutely. Yeah, and just to name again, like it's a journey and These big kind of choices sometimes that we make to Essentially support ourselves at the end of the day Aren't always easy and and that's why there's support there to help you move through that process And like you said to kind of have that look ahead to the light at the end of the tunnel like that Which will be different And this kind of goes into you know a point I wanted to share which was leaning on others You know finding your community and that support that feels really beneficial to you You know to know that you aren't meant to do life alone, right? Like none of us are and so really ensuring that you are well-resourced So that you can make choices that are for your best self Instead of just what you're kind of already doing right like that's such such an important piece here That I yeah, I thought was important yeah, and and finding the right community finding the you know, the community that you feel good in because I've seen it and you know, unfortunately, there are some PCOS groups out there that it turns into Just the victim, you know mindset and it just turns into a negative spiral and Unfortunately, it just takes one person, you know So if that does not feel right for you, then then move on to the next one, you know
Find something else that does whether that's a group, you know on social media in person Online or just one person, you know, it has to feel right for sure yeah, and I appreciate you saying that because I noticed that as well in my spaces is You know, especially for for teachers who have left the profession there are a lot of people who want to continue to speak about what didn't work for them, right and Again, that's I just want to name like it is tricky at times to kind of get ourselves out of the mindset We were once in and so, you know one of the first things that comes up is to just continue to speak about it right to kind of be in this loop and Try and get ourselves through it that way and really I want to provide this kind of opening option that What if we start to approach in different and new ways and how can that be more beneficial than kind of staying stuck? In you know the same kind of rehearsed Piece that is just keeping us where we already are Yeah, you have to break the pattern and that might be yeah, that might be all it takes, you know And then you might have to do it again, but but to start making that that first change and recognizing, you know What is happening? Yeah, you have to I have to break that pattern. Yeah, and and Knowing that you might need to look a couple times like you said the first group you join or the first support that you seek Might not be that like landing. Ah, this feels just so nurturing and so supportive and so To know like I might need to try three different groups or I might need to have You know a couple different calls with people and feel out what works best you know, we are dynamic people as human beings and we're not meant to connect equally with everyone and so knowing the spaces and places that feel really really good for you and those that don't and if you're finding ones that don't quite align just knowing that there are spaces that align Really deeply for you. Yeah. Yeah Yeah, yeah. Yeah, definitely in today's world. I mean, there's so much out there So yes that just because you start with the first one like you're not stuck with that. There's so much out there now I feel like for for so many things Yes So as we kind of start wrapping up What would you say to anyone who's feeling knocked off their Center or disconnected from their vitality right now? Mm-hmm Yeah, and there's so many ways that this can show up and we've been speaking about some of them here today but you know this can look as small as I'm just Feeling a little like we were saying before a little more resentful than I normally am and that's not really how I operate or want to be feeling and it can look as big as You know Wow my health is really presenting in numerous different ways a lot of challenges that are making me, you know, really struggle through the day and a lot deeper of a way or maybe I'm not able to show up and do my my work in the way that I know I can show up and so it's such a Spectrum just to name that in terms of kind of feeling this This out of touchness with maybe our wellness or our vitality and just to name for a moment what I mean here by vitality is really that your energy like you and your energy like flowing and moving through you and so if we're really feeling stuck our vitality is gonna feel stuck and We can actually like somatically physically feel that right like a you know attention in your hip or like a closed offness at the throat like you can't quite get your words out and so So many different ways that this can kind of exist for you but really I think the one thing I want to mention here is just if you are feeling any sort of Dissonance or disconnection in your life right now just knowing that you are only a few steps away and Some you know intention and courage for sure from living a more easeful connected reality Where you do feel your best and I think when we're really in the thick of something is Like we've been saying sometimes the hardest to make a shift or a change or to know that we could feel better or differently and I really want to just Hold that hope I guess in this case for anyone listening that it absolutely improves and gets better and That you are again meant to live your best Self you are meant to feel good in this life, right? We are not here to just be these stressed out little You know hyper performing little being Like envisioning little like ants like marching to their world Exactly and we're marching home and it's like wow we are meant to do so much in the world and to thrive And you really deserve To enjoy this one precious life that you have and and to thrive
Yeah, yeah, I mean and that just goes perfectly with the podcast because I mean that's yeah that's part of that's part of the healing journey to you know to take that first step and And like you said, you know, just take a step back and enjoy enjoy things take some time for yourself start small So, yes, that's a great way to wrap this all up Last question is how can somebody connect with you and find you? Yeah, absolutely. So you can find me at my website is www.reconnect by jessebree.com and so that's J E S S I E B R I And I'm on Instagram as well at reconnect with three underscores in front of it So I'm sure we'll have that information Below as well. Yeah. Yeah, that's the best place to find me to start and I as Lindsay does as well work with clients one-on-one and so that's kind of the best way to connect in And just to mention as well, this was coming up in our discussion. I have a free resource You can find on my website called the resource list And so if you're kind of finding that, you know You're wanting to find the best ways to support and resource yourself day in day out and to take that inventory I have a full breakdown. It's a free Resource you can find there and download and just gets you to really yeah Tap into like what does really support me get curious around that. I like to post it like right behind my computer So when I'm in the thick of a work day or what have you and I just need a moment like I can look At it and go. Wow. I've got like a hundred things on this list. What would feel good right now? And so I just wanted to mention that because it's a nice tool It's got lots of suggestions in there if you can't think of your own off the top of your head And yeah, that's on my website as well. Love that. Love that Well, thank you so much for being here for this conversation I definitely feel like there's a lot of women out there that need to hear this stuff So I really appreciate you taking the time to be here Thank you so much for having me Thank you so much for listening to this episode of PCOS unfiltered I hope this conversation with Jesse Reminded you that you do not have to wait until your body is screaming at you to start paying attention You are allowed to notice the signs now You are allowed to honor your needs now and you are allowed to create a life that feels supportive nourishing and sustainable One of my favorite takeaways from this episode is the reminder to get curious not judgmental about the ways you may be putting yourself second Because awareness is where healing begins and sometimes the most powerful first step is simply asking yourself. What do I need right now? If this episode resonated with you I would love for you to share it with a friend Take a screenshot and tag us on social media or leave a review somewhere women can find these conversations and start their own healing journey You can connect with Jesse through her website reconnect by Jesse Brie and I'll make sure her links including her free resource lists are included in the show notes for you and As always remember your body is not working against you Your needs are not too much and healing often begins the moment you stop abandoning yourself I'm sending you so much love and I'll see you in the next episode of PCOS Unfiltered: Nourish Heal Thrive